


Attention-Starved

by JamesAeza



Series: A Little Too Literal [6]
Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders Angst, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Starvation, Weight Issues
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-19
Updated: 2020-10-19
Packaged: 2021-03-09 01:35:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,322
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27106570
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JamesAeza/pseuds/JamesAeza
Summary: Roman feeds on attention- everyone knows that. What the others haven't learned yet is that it's more serious than they thought. His body is slowly fading.
Relationships: Anxiety | Virgil & Creativity | Roman & Logic | Logan & Morality | Patton, Anxiety | Virgil Sanders/Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders
Series: A Little Too Literal [6]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1871620
Comments: 14
Kudos: 204





	Attention-Starved

**Author's Note:**

> Guess who's whumping Roman again? Meeee!  
> Also TW for EDs probably? Roman does not have an ED in this but some of the things he does (like measuring his waist) might be triggers.  
> I hope you enjoy.   
> (also I liked cat Virgil so much that until further notice Virgil is gonna stay a cat)

Roman frowned as he pulled the tape tightly around his waist, marking down the number. Glancing at the page, it was clear that the numbers had been dwindling for a while. 

He looked to the mirror, tracing his bony torso and skinny arms. Once upon a time, he’d been strong. He hadn’t killed anything in ages, he barely had the strength to get up in the morning, much less go on his princely adventures. 

He carefully looked himself over. He knew exactly what had happened and why. 

_ Attention-starved.  _

Roman knew this. He also knew that the others could hardly be expected to accommodate his needy self. Besides, if he told them, and they tried to help, it would all be fake. He didn’t need all his friends lying to him out of pity. 

Most of the scraps he did get, he got from Patton, who tried to remember to say nice things when Roman did a good job. They all knew he liked positive feedback, even if they didn’t know the full effect it had on him. 

Logan’s words had the strongest effect on him, because anything Logan said was completely objective and almost definitely true. So if he said an idea was stupid, Roman wouldn’t be sleeping that night, but if he said it was ‘adequate’, he might even feel satisfied for a day or two. 

Virgil’s words weren’t as strong as Logan’s, but he said awful things so often. He was likely the reason that Roman was here now, marking tiny numbers and staring at a weak, skinny frame in the mirror. Upset as he was, though, he couldn’t bring himself to hate Virgil over this. It was just the anxiety talking, even if it did hurt. 

He pulled on his shirt, looking again to the mirror. It did a good job hiding things. Some days he put up an illusion, but lately he hadn't had the strength to do even that. 

He wondered if he could fade away, or if he’d just hurt forever. 

He plastered on his smile as he made his way down the hall. Logan was sipping at a mug of coffee, and Patton was telling him a long, animated story about something or other. Roman watched for a little while, not ready to break the moment before Patton noticed him in the doorway. 

“Roman!”

It didn’t take long before Roman was seated at the table next to Logan with a plate of food that would do nothing for him. He looked down at it, imagining how amazing it would be to only need to eat to satiate one’s hunger. 

He had been sitting there for goodness knows how long when a sleepy Virgil joined them, stealing something off Roman’s plate. It took a second for it to register. Logan was giggling into his coffee, and he knew he should at least be somewhat upset, so he went for Virgil’s weak spot- scratching behind his ears made him absolutely melt. 

Patton quickly came over, offering Virgil his own food. “Virgil, don’t take Roman’s food. Look at him, he could use a little more weight.” Roman flinched, which no one seemed to notice. Patton scratched Virgil’s head again before sitting down. Virgil cut off his purr with an annoyed groan. He placed his chin on the table. “Everyone’s mean to me.”

“Nope, you are just too darn cute!” Patton informed him. 

Taking advantage of the distraction, Roman went to snap away his food before realizing that he did not have the energy. He stared at it. This was not a good thing. The lower his energy, the more difficult it got to use his usual creative abilities, but never before had he been completely unable to snap anything away. 

In his confusion, it took him a moment to realize that Patton had a hand on his shoulder. “You okay, kiddo?”

Roman stared at the others for a second, all looking at him with confusion and concern, and he stood up and walked quickly away. 

  
  


He sucked in a breath, rubbing his sides in a desperate attempt to assuage some of the pain. It was a deep gnawing, an ache that never went away. Because he wasn’t good enough to warrant the praise that would keep him satisfied. 

He jumped to his feet when he heard the knocking that he knew was coming. Answering the door, he was not surprised to find a very worried-looking Patton. “...are you okay?”

“Fine,” he assured him, biting his lip as he fought to stay upright. His vision was spotty. This was new, too.

“Um, I- you didn’t eat anything, so I made pizza for lunch because I know how much you like it. Do you wanna maybe come?”

His mouth tugged into a smile. Even if the food itself wouldn’t help, it helped a little that it had been made out of concern for him. “I’d love to.”

Joining the others, he was quick to bite into it. Sure, he’d throw it up, but that was fine. Who cared about that? He managed one and a half slices before excusing himself to the bathroom with a smile, puking it up, cleaning up after himself and returning calmly. He was… holding up. This was fine. 

Well, it had been fine. Fine until Logan had asked him to sit down, placing the papers Roman had given him a few days ago on the table and slowly began to break the ideas apart in a quiet, monotone voice. 

“See, it just won’t work. It’s incredibly unrealistic, and oddly similar in theme to one your brother gave last week. I know you can do better than this, Roman. Roman?”

Logan looked up to see the other completely frozen, seemingly staring off into space. 

“Roman, is there something going on that you haven’t told us about?”

Roman tried to get to his feet, and then the floor was rushing towards him, head spinning before he blacked out. 

  
  


Roman felt himself waking to hushed voices, pain still there, but muted, as if his head were filled with cotton. He tried to sit up, but found he could not do it on his own. Patton was quick to notice he was up, helping him into a sitting position, propping him up on a pile of pillows. Roman slowly looked around the room he was in- Logan’s room, it must have been the nearest one when he’d-

Oh god, he had passed out in front of all of them. Now he’d have to come up with a lie to explain it away and-

“Ro, we already know.” Patton was looking at him, eyes sad.

“Wha’?”

“Logan figured it out. It’s like the same as those bruises you get, or when Logan will get numb or cold.”

Logan interrupted him, ears pink. “Yes, I did figure it out. And my question for you is why you did not share the issue with us? You know we could have helped.”

“I...I guess.”

They sat in silence for a moment before Virgil carefully seated himself on the bed. “You’re really smart, you know that?”

Roman gasped as the pain started to ebb, Virgil giving him a crooked, sad smile. 

“Pretty, too,” he went on. “And without you, Thomas would be nothing.”

“I have to agree,” Logan broke in. “The vast majority of your work is… more than satisfactory.” 

A teary-eyed Patton was quick to join in. “We love you, kiddo. We need you.” 

“I… you don’t have to lie to me,” Roman whispered. 

Virgil looked to him, placing a hand gently on his stomach. “Do these feel like lies?” When he received no response, he went on. “We’re not making things up. We’re just telling you what we should have been saying all along.”

Roman opened his mouth to reply, then closed it slowly. There was nothing to say. His family was here, they were helping him, and he felt okay.

**Author's Note:**

> I am still taking ideas for this series! I might not do all of them because I'm not sure how, or inspiration just doesn't strike, but I really do appreciate your ideas. I've already done a couple suggestions and I had a lot of fun with them!
> 
> Anyway, I hope you enjoyed and I hope you choose to leave a lil comment for me :)


End file.
